Trevor starts holding noisy raves every night in the kitchen, and Hamish becomes increasingly irritated that he is never invited. But Big Brother is watching.
The parrot comes face to face with an exact replica of himself, as our heroes travel into a parallel universe through a mysterious time portal in the airing cupboard.
When Hamish is made head of a notorious Mafia family, he orders the parrot to kill Trevor. In the meantime, Hamish seems to be having more than a little trouble with his “arsegrapes”.
Hamish becomes convinced that he has turned into a Mexican, so Trevor decides to try a little aversion therapy.
When the parrot goes on guard duty, and Hamish goes in search of a German spy, war is declared in the Pets house.
Much to the disgust of Hamish, Trevor enters for Stars In Their Eyes in the guise of screen legend Marilyn Monroe.
Hamish has been constipated for 14 months, so Trevor persuades him to try an extremely unorthodox cure. Meanwhile, JP asks the cat to go away with him for a dirty weekend.
Whilst sitting in the downstairs toilet, Hamish has a vision of the Archangel Gabriel and decides to dedicate himself to God. In the meantime, Trevor tries to persuade the cat to dress up for him as a nun.
Trevor assumes the guise of Sherlock Holmes in order to solve, once and for all, the mystery of Jack the Ripper, while Hamish discovers the delights of having sex with a Victorian washstand.